Saturday, September 3, 2016

The Buzz of Inspiration

I woke up this morning with a buzz of energy from inspiration that was seeded in my dream state. I started this blog (and others I have done in the past) to share things that have made profound impact on my life and with balancing more and more with living a soul based life.

Basically I enjoy sharing those AHA! moments that I receive from practice, meditation and research. My passion is aligning myself in full harmony and balance with my soul and so naturally, that is what I love to talk about!

Lately I have had to take a huge reality pill to some major addictions that I have been hiding. It wasn't easy and honestly, I have had to shift myself quite a few degrees in order to face some major toxicity in my life. But because I choose to be transparent with my own journey, I wrote this post to share some personal things that I have had to AHA! to in my life because I know there may be others going through the same things.

One major addiction I had to admit to was certain foods that my body is terribly effected by but they still find their way into me, many times by the painful act of binge eating. This is a sad cycle that harbors so many emotions and feelings for me. This was hard for me to open up about this because being versed on the body and food as a path to higher awareness and being someone who shares this knowledge, I felt ashamed and frustrated to not be able to break free of this. The truth was I felt weak, like I didn't have the willpower to do something so simple that others were accomplishing with no problem. It wasn't until I learned about binge eating and started to acknowledge my food situation as an addiction, that change started to happen. It is slow, but I now accept who I am just as I am, and I refuse to see myself as broken. This is a major first step.

This leads to the next toxicity that I want to open up about. My obsession I have had since I was a child to figure out what was wrong and fix it. I admit that I have lived most of my life in this way. By doing this, I have been running from the past and waiting for some mystical future that will never come. Feeling like the present is broken, be it family, a situation, diet, health, fitness, work, finances, etc., means we are not living in the present and we are more importantly, not accepting who we are in the now. This was such an AHA for me because I realized I was even practicing my sessions with clients in this very same way. We were looking for the root of what was wrong in order to clear it and let it go. And yes, it creates relief and has created wonderful shifts and changes for many, but it also creates the next thing to chase after to the root. And then we end up spending our life chasing weeds rather than harvesting abundance. Focusing on what is wrong rather than what is right. The biggest thing that I started doing to shift this was stop apologizing about myself to others, and stop defending myself to others. I accept who I am!

I have let loving myself and healing this amazing body I live in now to be my focus. 

This came because yet another AHA! moment I had when I realized I was addicted to stimulants. I loved the energy, the feeling of importance and things to do. My brain has been wired this way for a long time and because of this it has a hard time just being in the moment. Stimulants have come in many forms, but the biggest culprits have been any type of caffeine and even things like the internet. Something interesting happened after I learned this. I found the "root" or place the habit started from a whole new perspective. A much softer and accepting place. I realized that stress I had experienced starting in my early childhood (which fed my desire to fix things!) was a huge factor, and this had begun the continual draining of my adrenals from a really young age. There is a natural cause and effect that the entire body follows and I began to realize how everything from my food addictions, to my need to fix things, to the massive metabolic damage in my body, was all connected. Over the years I have been using my addiction to stimulants for an outside source of energy and an escape.

And, AHA! it was all coming from stress! This was so illuminating to me because I have known about the damage of stress for so long, but until I saw how it was creating this damaging cycle in my life and in my body, it wan't very real to me. I was in denial! I honestly felt like I had stress and my life under control. Spoken like a true addict.

My focus is now on creating the best environment for my body 
to help it do what it does best....homeostasis!

Allowing my gut, my gums and my metabolic state to return to balance is my ultimate drive. What this means in day to day life is slowing down and being more present in each moment. Each time I make a food choice, I assess if it is healing or hindering my body. And most importantly my diligence has been on detoxing my thoughts. This means really paying attention to the words that I weeding out words like "but", "want" and "try", and reframing my sentences from a perspective of abundance not lack.   I am not worried about when optimum energy and health will happen anymore, or even needing it in order to feel ok. Shifting from a focus on fixing what is wrong, to aligning with what feels right is all that I need to remind myself to do everyday.
am using,

Doing all of this has opened me to this whole new level of inspiration that I am so excited to share.

Some of the posts I am writing now are on simple wonders like turmeric, selenium, iodine and oregano oil for starters. And getting back to doing things that make us happy, (like surfing!). But the one thing that I want to share as the most important place to start has been with sleep and letting sleep be a powerful medicine for the body. What better place is there for lucid dreaming or astral travel?!

And let's not forget....appreciation and gratitude are key!

Thank you so much for in some way being a part of this journey with me.


1 comment:

  1. You are such an amazing inspiration in your gift to all of us! Love you!